Wow, you people really loved the boob post. Who knew you were so easy to entertain? Well, to keep everyone happy, I’ll stay on topic this week. This story only relates to the entertainment industry in that I discovered it through research of a play I’m working on. And it’s about a tremendously hard working woman. Enjoy.

The play I’m performing in is about airline stewardesses from the 70s. The director has been meeting with a real flight attendant from the era who now does training for new “stews.” From the 1930s through the 70s, stewardesses were sex symbols. Your job back then was to almost be a stand in for the businessmen’s wives/mistresses. You had to be thin, pretty, and know how to prepare and serve a four-course gourmet meal. Times have certainly changed.

The stewardess we’ve been speaking to was the very first airline attendant to get maternity leave. Previously, once you had children, you were cut from the job. But our friend got 6 months leave for each child she had. 3 months after her third child was born, her good fortune with the industry ran out. The airline called and exclaimed “You have to come back to your job. We need you tomorrow for a flight to Barcelona. If you don’t take it we’re cutting you.” She freaked out and called her doctor who said “Don’t worry, take the flight. We’ll bind your breasts and you’ll be fine.”

So she takes the flight. 12 hours after she left her child they are boarding the return flight back to Kennedy. Her tits had swelled to the size of watermelons and she’s in horrible pain. Suddenly a soldier in uniform boards the aircraft carrying a 6-month-old baby. She asks him “Where’s the mother?” and he replies, “That’s why I came to Spain. The mother is unfit to take care of the child so I’m bringing it back to the America.” I need to point out here that both the soldier and the baby were African-American. You’ll see why this is significant. The year is 1972.

Shortly after the takeoff, the baby starts screaming. He hasn’t been fed, and the father didn’t bring any food with him (this was obviously his first child.) 4 hours into the flight, way up over the Atlantic, the child is STILL screaming. The stewardess’ tits are about to explode. Finally she goes over to the soldier and says “Can I just take the baby and feed it?” He hands her the child and says “Yes! Take him!” The stewardess takes the baby into a private compartment in the front, and nurses him from her tit. Oh yes, she did.

I think that’s so amazing, it’s like a superhero story. The super Stew and her 2 secret weapons save the day. Everyone wins… the baby falls right to sleep and the monster boobs have some relief. But the plot thickens.

It’s 1972 and a white stewardess is nursing a black baby. Milk is all the same and that kid will take it however he can get it, but to others on board, this was a big problem. Several of the passengers wrote letters to the airline about her “outrageous” behavior, and other racist letters were sent about how this black child had been screaming the entire time. Uh, you’d think they’d applaud her down the aisles for relieving the kid and their ears, but some people are fucking ignorant. The other stewardess, who was also African American, even had a problem with it. She yelled at the woman as she was going to the compartment saying “This is unprofessional! And you cannot nurse a black child!” She complained to the airline as well.

Luckily for our hero, the airline took no action. They didn’t give her any gold stars either, which she obviously deserved. Letting a passenger take to your nipple is certainly above and beyond the call of duty.

Unfortunately, we have not added this scene into our production. That would be tremendous if one of the characters grabbed a child out of the audience and started nursing it, but we may run into legal problems. Here is a photo from the workshop we did earlier this year, I hope you find it as enticing.

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